What does motherhood mean to you?
In the dictionary under motherhood it states: Having or relating to an inherent worthiness, justness, or goodness that is obvious or unarguable. Having the qualities or spirit of a mother.
My whole life I have desired to be a mother, and have not yet had the opportunity to do so. Sometimes this pulls at the most sensitive strings in my heart, but the beautiful thing is, women have innate qualities, that are just specific to their genetic make-up, that contain the gifts with the qualities of motherhood.
When I was serving on a service mission in South America, in Chile, shortly after high school, the mission president in the area asked us to list all the qualities of our mothers, and with about 200 of us, we had the chalkboard full of the most desired qualities and characteristics one could ever desire to possess; loving, patient, kind, selfless, humble, giving, long-suffering, positive, forgiving, good listener, unconditional, playful, fun, compassionate, bright, loyal, honest, and the list goes on and on. I know we don't see all the time these qualities in ourselves, especially when we feel like a hot mess with kids running crazy all over the house or teenagers defiantly disregarding and disrespecting you, but these innate gifts are there and accessible to you as a woman.
I want to speak for a minute to you single mothers...
Those of you who are playing the role of the mother and the father, balancing being compassionate, kind, forgiving, and disciplinary and structured all on your own. My mother also had this stressful role of raising us kids as a single mom and us kids did not make it easy on her. We had no way of understanding what she was going through in our limited and self-centered teenage minds, and who easier to blame for everything than your mother? I want you to know ladies, you are doing your best, and grace will step in to guide your children in the areas it is just impossible for you to do all on your own. I am so grateful for my mother and what she did to mother and father us everyday, and now I have a great relationship with her and greater respect for what she went through. Single mothers, tell yourselves everyday that you are enough and grace will give the rest. Don't beat yourself up, just love yourself unconditionally with that same love you feel for your children, you deserve it too.
Lastly I will speak to you single women, of whom I most relate to your inner-soul desire to be a mother but have not yet had that opportunity...
Many years ago when I was really struggling with being single and not being a mother, I felt so inferior, insignificant and forgotten. Mothers day was a big sting in my heart, especially when I was in places that only mothers were recognized, it felt somehow you were less because you hadn't had children yet. One day a speaker asked all the mothers to stand and all the women who desire to be mothers to stand, then she began to talk to us about our calling of greatness to love on children, be examples to them and teach others all over the world of their potential because of our unique gifts. Her simple inclusion instead of exclusion of me, caused a shift in my heart to realize that I have motherhood qualities and I can use them in so many ways on this Earth. Some are called to bare and raise their own children, others are called to raise generations of children all over the world.
As a woman, you feel a stewardship over certain people in your life, this is the calling you have been given to use those innate gifts and offer that "grace" that we all seek to receive where we fall short. The key is to identify who you feel this stewardship over, it may be nieces and nephews, brother and sisters, it may be people in your church community or neighborhood, or it may be a humanitarian project that you feel inspired to get involved with or lead. Identify your purpose and you can be the grace that others seek by offering your talents and strengths to inspire greatness in others.
My favorite definition in positive psychology is “One of the best things a person can do to increase one’s quality of life is to help others increase their level of happiness and life satisfaction”. Women, you have the innate divine ability to do this. I honor and respect you today as we remember motherhood and what it really represents; the gift to lift and inspire others, as after all, it is a natural ability you already desire and possess. Happy Mother's Day!